Following the Itinerary
If you are bored at work and want something to read, here's our Tour Itineraries from a few of our tours. Each one was written for us by our Guru, OJ Hammond, and will give you a little bit of insight into the Still Flyin' Worldfeel. As we return to SF at the end of each tour we go down the checklist and to our surprise and self-congratulatory revelry, we actually complete about 80% percent of the things on every itinerary. Obviously there's some things that couldn't happen (at least not yet) - like going to Keanu Reeves' afterparty - but the bulk of it was accomplished. Read on.
West Coast Tour - Fall 2005
Friday, October 14, 2005 - SANTA CRUZIN’
Lets get it, guys.
5:30 - meet up in the parking lot of the practice space.
Somebody bring some chips and a nice salsa dip.
Also beer.
First, have a meeting. Don’t just rush into this shit, seriously.
Once everyone is there, sit down in a circle - and talk about things.
Who gives a fuck if other bands are loading in and looking at you guys weird.
Have they ever gotten off their asses and gone on tour, im going to say FUCK NO!
Nothing lame in the chats, just awesome things.
Talk about the expectations for tonight’s show. Crack a few.
Always remember to laugh.
Get your ass inside, pumped, and load out to the van.
Drink some wine, maybe.
Make sure the driver is not drinking.
Then take that shit to SANTA CRUZ!
This is the fucking skateboard capital of America.
Be proud that you guys are playing here.
Somebody can probably sneak a flask in the van.
Have some good convo’s on the way down.
Encourage each other – how’s the salsa lasting?
Get a good chant going.
Suggested chant: HIGHER THAN HELL! JUST TOLL THAT BELL!
Arms out the window and everything.
Get to the show, load in - throw away the refuse cans.
Recycle, that shit YO!
Let Whysp open for you guys, no matter what.
SA will figure out the drink ticket shit, so cool your roll - you will drink tonight.
Frank / Gabe, go find a dunk tank - fill it with water and practice holding your
individual breaths
We are going to need you guys to wail tonight!
Play the show. Smoke before. Smoke during. Smoke after.
Crack in double time.
Smoke more. High five when the show is done, because you guys succeeded.
Let the crowd see this, they will appreciate your efforts.
(Kick it up a notch mentally)
The crowd will be going nuts for an encore, give em a low blow.
Hit em hard - The Bird Is Aware.
Be careful not to blow your whole bone here.
You might sell out of merch, be sure to syphon that shit.
You guys are awesome. Think about that. No kidding around here - think.
But remember tonight is just night one. A lot more hammjamming left to go.
Still though, hit up the afterparty.
Watch out for each other but someone do something crazy like piss in the pool a little bit.
Saturday, October 15, 2005 - Day Two - SAN DIEGOAPESHIT!
DOUBLE DAY OF THE TOUR 2. Second day equals double things.
This is probably going to be a long ass drive.
So bring some mags or a book.
BRAH put away the fuckin’ HUSTLER man - that shit is poison (on this trip).
Zach, you should drive most or part of the way today - I like your navigating
You guys (will probably) be hungover.
Ease up on thinking about super awesome riffs today, at least in the morning hours.
Your brain will forgive you later and take you to a higher level of existence for it.
Brains appreciates rompin as much as you, just not that early.
Maybe find a smooth rock station and let Zach glide your mind alive.
Get some chats going. (Starting Topic: “Bet you didnt think this ____”)
Stop and get some grub and local fare, see what’s up at the local gas filling station.
No dried meat products.
Spirits are high, so why not get high.
I'm sure SA or Brah will have some treats - like some krispy treats - pass them around.
Laugh.
Get high. Talk to Mr. Alien.
Look at the landscape. This is earth. This is America. You guys are doing it!
Afternoon, and the weather is great. So are the taquitos, maybe pick up some and pass them around the van.
Lots of smiling and maybe even a song writing competition.
Then Haikus.
You guys have made it to the shore (time permitting).
Pull the van up to the beach and take a walk before the show starts.
Go to the boardwalk and get a high fiving train going.
Get the record for San Diego.
Dip your feet in the Pacifica - splash unbridled.
Now get your ass to the club.
SURPRISE THE FUCK OUT OF ARCHITECTURE IN HELSINKI by wearing Gold Hats.
They are all, “what the fuck? You guys!”
Then only half the band walk in. And say we had to have a skeleton crew.
Then the other half run in with yo-yos and start snappin.
AIH loses it.
Phil, stretch that shit out - we need you to have a big show tonight.
We don’t need you pulling a hammy or some other medical shit.
Sound check while tossin back a few cold ones.
SMOKE! SMOKE THE EARTH!
You deserve it.
WATCH DR DOG - trust me - awesome trip.
Get up on stage and play like you guys are in the olympics and representing your country of AWESOME RIFF!
AIH take a knee because you guys are smokin!
Really hitting the grooves right and making JAH so proud he tips his GOLDEN HAT!
Hit your stride and bring her home.
Climb up one level in sweetness and righteousness.
Gather the points.
ALICIA - Gather extra points for the newest member of the Flyin’ team!
(Congrats by the way)
The more points you store away into the memory banks now, the better his/her life will be.
Teach him/her to jam tonight!
Coupla smokies - fuckin twice! Bookend the set.
Dance your asses off to AIH, and show them some respect.
They did bring you out on tour - and while you are going to be kicking them live - they gotta realize their ownselves.
AFTERPARTY with the DIEGOS
AFTERPARTY with the SANS
AFTERPARTY with some honied love for life.
Before you lay your collective heads down to rest, look skyward.
Wink, cause you know it.
Sunday, October 16 - LAMAZIN'!
Watch out for today.
Shit is gonna get hectic, real quick - like Roger and Zapp.
We need some grooves for the drive today.
Get the spirit alive.
Get the sprint alive.
When everyone wakes up hold hands in a circle around the van.
I realize some of this shit might seem lame or hokey, but NO - its not.
Be friends first, bandmates second.
The aura you set off will give the van a good guide as to where to take you.
Let that shit tribal take over. The Space Jah will land you in the right spot.
Everyone crack one beer before you drive.
SOME of you are going to need a little hair of the dog, but overall this tactic is just to get the day off to the best start possible.
Jam it. Tunes wise - clap.
Now here is the point where we gotta get serious about something.
Pooping.
I mean everyone does it and will probably have already let a few go on this trip already, but respect each other’s interior clocks. Take a poop break. No farting in the van.
No lot lizards.
Did someone say hotbox?
Not yet. Hold it. Trust me.
Get some sort of scheme going for tonight’s show.
Don’t think AIH didnt think of something.
Beat them to the punch.
More beer.
This is the weekend, guys. Blast that shit off into the stratosphere for LA.
They arent expecting it - they think you guys are plastic.
Teach them why you are hemp!
Strong as ox.
Get to the club and send Jamie out for a pre show case of brews.
Don’t worry J, the rest will cover your set up and load in - you have an important job to do.
Don’t go with the special.
Throw around some ideas at the club pre-show - this is called MIND BUMP.
When was the last time you had a tasty buzz?
Yeah, probably last night - but today’ss is even better.
The club is packed and you guys go on stage for the most monumental show the town has seen.
Keanu Reeves is there and is ready to jam.
Mookers give him a shaker.
Phil give him a soul hug.
Tell him after party is at his house.
If that bitch Courtney Love shows up - tell security that she tried to snort a line of coke off the drum risor and get her booted. She will only bring you guys down.
Start the show off with a double leg kick from Brah and Phil.
ATOMIC!
Time to get crazy wild.
SA, do some arm whips. Get the amazon of CALI up on its feet.
You will probably see a lot of leather at this show, flow with it.
Don’t discriminate, use its power to further you.
Probably will also see a lot of cocaine.
The people that will offer it to you are lame though, so pass em by.
Crack a few.
During ART OF JAMMING someone yell out - SWITCH - and then laugh a lot
SA has double joints onstage tonight – don’t let them go to waste.
LA is cool with that and the fans will probably want some but tell them no - bands only.
Still Flyin, yall. Still Flyin so goddamned high.
Yoshi, this is you and Marj’s last night - take it to the house.
After show at the VIPER ROOM! WHAT!? COSMIC!
You guys may have to leave the show a little early to reserve the VIP room.
Call Johnny Depp and tell him you’llmeet him at the mansh first for a smoke break.
You get there and he has this wild ass asian weed - MARIA gets so high she starts speaking SPANISH all fast n shit. Loco.
Mookers takes it to the dude’s backyard and finds a stable, climbs on a horse and tells the rest of you guys she will meet you at the afterparty, cause she is going to arrive horseback!
WHAT THE FUCK, right?! WAY TO GO MOOK FOR TAKING IT UP A LEVEL!
Hammjamm level 4 commence.
The night is alive and so is your mind. High five yourself.
Depp tries you guys to do a seance or some shit.
Tell him no, we just wanna party, dude. He will understand – he’s the DEPPMAN!
You leave the van at the mansh so the stuff is save. Mind at ease.
Inside (the viper room), you will probably need to drink a few to calm the nerves.
Teach these stuckup fools how to cut loose.
Ingrain it in them.
Double fist. Double drinks. Double awareness.
Then Jennifer Aniston shows up, someone have the guts to slap her on the back and say, “what the fuck is up with you?! TASTES GREAT or LESS FILLING! HAR!”
Then all of a sudden a pool, skinnydip!
Flip it.
Flip it even more. Take the jag for a spin.
You look over and Frank has his sax out and is jamming “NIGHT MOVES” by Seger!
Truly a party now.
Party until 5:30a
Get some food, maybe a Denny’s or Crazy Burrito Hut
Drop Marj and Yosh off at the airport with a round of high fives and fist bumps.
Guys they earned it this time, show them some love.
Send them back to work still livin’ and pain free
Sleep it off for a bit
Monday, October 17, 2005 - Drive back to SAN FANTASTICASSHIT
Climb in the van knowing you are the best.
Climb in the van knowing there are a bunch of people in this world who love your minds.
Climb in and take it home.
The big city awaits ya.
She misses her sons and daughters of smoke.
Her sons and daughters of Zapppp.
Long drive, don’t let Thrill put his socks up on the dashboard.
Somebody jam some YACHT ROCK, please. This will get the spirits up even though the tour is ALMOST over.
Jam a little talk about the next level that we need to take this band
What is after Yacht Zap, yall?
We owe it to the people to bring it.
This is a quiet day, but also an awesome one.
Chime in on one another’s thoughts.
Tell each other your favorite moments of the quick trip.
Tonight, cool out.
But kick some brews.
When you get back, maybe have a party.
As a matter of fact, HAVE A PARTY.
Monday night parties are literally the best things in the world.
Keep it a live joint for two more nights.
At this party someone can show up with some serious Pizza.
WILE OUT!
The Za is fresh and you guys meet up with Yosh and Marj again.
REUNITED FULLY!
Crack some brews as the sun is setting. Pet Goose.
Someone put on some fun jams, like Love.
Think who came before you, and where you are going from here on.
First band to jam that shit live off the earf!
OK!
The party winds down as everyone is high as hell.
Its alright though your mind is tingling.
Speaking to you, leaking down into your chest and you feel the warmth.
Look to the west, breathe the air. Is it filled with that “ponic shit!” Awesome.
Yall gotta pray!
Tuesday, October 18, 2005 - LAST SHOW OF TOUR 2!
First thing, take the day off.
Go to Golden Gate park - drum circle it with the tree people.
Start out at someones house and take a few travelers.
Thats what we around these parts call - walking drinks.
Street drink.
Not too much, because it’s a Tuesday and also you don’t want to get sloppy arrested.
TONIGHT, YOU OWN THIS CITY.
AIH and Dr. Dog don’t stand a chance.
This is your home turf, guys. TURF IT!
FLIP EM SO BAD THEY DON’T KNOW WHAT HIT EM!
Sold out show.
Sold out backstage.
Sold out crowd chanting - NEVER GONNA TOUCH THE GROUND!
Check your website. How many hits have you gotten today?
12,000?
GOOD! They will all be there tonight to cheer you on.
Tonight you gotta sway back and forth while hugging one another.
Sean gets up on stage with a tray full of fruit juice.
Says to take get re-hydrated before the show start.
Little did you know he spiked that shit with goldengrain!
Now its time to fly.
Now its time to fly.
KEEP FLYIN’!
You guys, I love you - wish I could be there for Tour 2 - THE MENAZ!
SLAM FACES everyone!
The crowd loves it.
Cries tears of joy.
At the afterparty over at Mook and SA’s you guys wink at each other with wry smiles.
Cause they aint even seen what’s coming next.
Next.
Next.
Forever.
Sweden Tour - Fall 2006
Sweden Tour - Spring 2007
Australia Tour - Spring 2008
Thanks for the read.
